When I was little, I stayed with my grandparents because my parents went away for the weekend. I remember seeing a green felt book on the dining room table. Inside that book was precious information. In the alphabetical sections, my grandmother had recorded all of her family and friends. She included their spouses and children. Many times there were scratched-off addresses and phone numbers of people who moved. This was back in time when you didn’t keep your phone number. Sometimes, though very rarely, were names scratched off due to divorce. You can see her love in her penmanship. She carefully wrote each name in her book. She also detailed the events in their lives.

But the most extraordinary thing about the olive green book was with every entry, were the dates. birthdays and wedding dates were attached to every person in her book. She knew when to send cards to everyone she loved. She had a shoe box ready to go with greeting cards for any event in a person’s life. If anyone ever wondered about someone’s birthday, she always had the answer at her fingertips.

Fast forward a few decades and the social scene is very different. Technology and social media are how we communicate today. Technology has brought us closer together. It has made things easier to contact family and friends. Pen Pals from when I was in elementary school takes on a whole new meaning now because of social media.

Social media has made it convenient and easy to stay in touch with friends and family. Reminders of birthdays, posts of anniversaries, and the like flood our notifications on our phones. But is it too easy to just post a “Happy Birthday” when the box that goes, “Ding!” say it’s a friend’s birthday? Does social media help us to remember their special day?

So I did an experiment. This is not a scientific experiment. I haven’t done it for many years to see what results I received. I did this experiment one time. And in that one time, I was enlightened.

When I joined Facebook, I put in my full birthday. September would come around and my notifications were flooded with well-wishes for my birthday. Seeing family, friends, and people I haven’t spoken with in a long time wish me a Happy Birthday was wonderful. It made me feel loved and blessed.

Then I took off my birthday in my profile. September came and went and not a single Happy Birthday was posted in my feed. This experiment made me question if social media actually helps us socially. Are we just following the notifications, or are we actually learning when our closest friend’s birthdays are? Are we really paying attention to the posts our loved ones are posting, or are we just scrolling blindly?

The Impact of Social Media Notifications on Engagement

Social media platforms have cleverly designed their systems to capture our attention effectively. Notifications serve as a powerful tool in this regard, as they keep users engaged and coming back for more. Here’s how this process works:

1. Dopamine Release:
Each time we receive a like, comment, or message, our brain reacts by releasing dopamine. This neurotransmitter is associated with pleasure and reward. This creates a quick sense of validation and social approval, reinforcing the behavior of checking notifications frequently.

2. Changing Priorities:
Over time, many individuals may start to prioritize digital interactions over more meaningful, face-to-face conversations. The allure of instant gratification from online engagement can overshadow the slower, but often richer, experiences of in-person communication.

3. Consequences on Social Skills:
As a result of this shift, individuals might experience a decline in their social skills. They feel more comfortable behind screens. This is because they avoid engaging in real-life discussions. This change can lead to feelings of isolation, despite being “connected” online.

Exploring the Impact of Notifications on Human Connection

In today’s digital age, notifications play a crucial role in our daily interactions. While they can foster a sense of connection, they often lack the depth and authenticity of real-life interactions.

• A simple “like” on a photo cannot equate to a heartfelt conversation.
• Similarly, a quick comment falls short when compared to the emotional nuance of a genuine discussion.
  
  Despite being more “connected” than ever, many people report feelings of loneliness and social isolation. This paradox reveals the need to seek deeper connections in our interpersonal relationships. We should rely on more meaningful interactions instead of depending solely on digital ones.
  
  Things we can do:
  
  1. Quality vs. Quantity: The focus should shift from the number of interactions to the quality of those interactions.
  
  2. Active Engagement: Engaging in meaningful conversations can help bridge the gap that digital interactions often create.
  
  3. Mindful Usage: Being mindful of how we use technology may lead to stronger real-life connections.
  
  Ultimately, we must strive to balance our digital lives. It’s important to engage in authentic human experiences. Doing so can combat the growing feelings of loneliness in our society.

The Impact on Relationships

Relying on notifications for social engagement can alter the way we build and maintain relationships. Rather than investing time in meaningful conversations, some individuals opt for quick interactions that require minimal effort. This shift can weaken personal relationships and lead to a superficial sense of connection. Additionally, social media does not necessarily make us smarter socially. Many people forget important milestones, such as birthdays and anniversaries, unless they receive a notification. This dependency can erode the thoughtfulness and effort that once characterized personal relationships.

Finding a Balance

Social media is a valuable tool for staying in touch. However, it is essential to strike a balance between online and offline interactions. Setting boundaries, like limiting notification alerts, is beneficial. You can also designate tech-free time with loved ones. These actions can help foster deeper and more meaningful relationships. When you know a friend’s or family member’s birthday, anniversary, or event, add the date to your calendar. Text them on that date instead of a comment on social media. It will feel more heartfelt and not get lost in their notifications.

Social media notifications can provide a sense of connectivity, but they should not replace genuine human interactions. We need to be mindful of our digital habits. Prioritizing real-life connections is crucial. This way, technology can enhance our relationships instead of diminishing them. Ultimately, true connection lies in meaningful conversations. It resides in shared experiences. The quality of time spent together is important, not just in the notifications that appear on our screens.

Conclusion

Getting back to basics is the best way to communicate and build upon our relationships. When we take the time to grab our felt, green book, it strengthens our connections. This book is now a device. Giving a heartfelt message to our friends and family makes those relationships much stronger.

Have there been times in which the notifications you receive in your feed feel forced? Have there been times where you feel pressured to respond to people in your feed? Or maybe it isn’t a problem because this is the life we live now. I would love to hear your discussion in the comments.